Unconditional

" Love is supposed to be unconditional, if it's not I'll become more transitional, and end up becoming a lost chapter in your book, just call me fictional"

So I like that line above, it rings true to how I'm feeling today, yesterday, and how I'll feel for the rest of my life. So I was listening to John Legends first CD, its great if you have yet to hear it, and I found myself becoming lost in the lyrics that hit home so HARD. I never imagined that I would find a soundtrack to my love life at the moment but this is it. 

Lets list the main tracks that touched on my feelings. 

I can change

Ordinary People

Refuge, and 

I'll stay with you.

These four tracks touch on the pain and struggle of a real relationship. A real emotional journey that people undertake. Far from the adolescent puppy love pains of yesteryear, but the love that transcends all logic and causes us to behave erratic and with random bursts of emotion. 

At the moment I am one of those lovesick individuals who has thrown logic to the wind and faces an uphill struggle for a sense of self. Oh I know who I am, just am finding myself lost without H.E.R. I find that I am easily hurt because I love harder than most. I wear my emotions on my sleeve, like it's a new fashion. The only problem is this trend isn't catching, she hasn't caught on to the new style. 

A smart man knows when to retreat, but a man in love isn't smart, but as irrational, stubborn, and in a sense full of self destruction as a man can be because love is blinding. Love is overpowering, and it can be crippling and detrimental to a person's sanity. Yes, I'm writing from experience. I just hope this lesson is a happy one, a moral learned that isn't atrocious...

Ignorance is bliss, but true love can make you wish you didn't exist. Yep.

I Use 2 Love H.E.R

Am I biased?

Being from Chicago has made me appreciate true hip-hop. True artists who strive for greatness and even though most do not achieve commercial success, they do receive a huge amount of respect. Common is one of my favorite artists. His word play transcends the scope of the average thinker. He sparks a urge to go out and react to the world and not just let the world react to you. 

The song that inspired me the most was I Use to Love H.E.R. This song has always been a link to me and hip-hop. Scratch that. This outstanding song has related to my life in so many ways: relationships, jobs, and my struggle to understand myself. 

Recently I have written a poem with this same title, and am now willing to share it with the world. So without any more procrastination here it is: 

I use 2 love H.E.R.

 

I use to love her

the way she made me feel was completely effervescent,
refreshing,
takin’ me back to days of puppy love that 
supposedly,
faded with my years of adolescence 
reborn was I in her, a union like pen and paper, 
music and keys, lets just call it a love that started at my heart 
but weakened my knees. 

I use to love her,

Her smile brought out the best in me, 
Her tears made my world cease to be
Melody of her voice made me wish time would slow down
wish I could rewind, 
To the moment that her words became mine 
I can still hear the sound,
Of our hearts becomin intertwined.
Not one being but the result of using no 
Contraception on the mind, 
Manifestation of words, tone and emotion
DNA and formula to a creative explosion
Not detrimental but pure elemental 
Not on the table rather something out of a fable
Relying on imagination to spur this sensation

I use to love her, 

Walk into my world from beyond the haze
Her touch made my vision clear and I found 
Myself focused out of a daze
Of loneliness,
walk-in hand in hand 
With the embodiment of my better days.
Sliding down memory lane lets me recall 
Where I came from and where she brought me
Far from the noise of the city, 
But into her abode,
A place of sensuous love I felt myself not being held,
but lovin havin someone to hold. 

I use to love her, 

Stimulation of my senses
I found all barriers being wiped away
No place for walls and fences,
I let her in and felt that this was the end, 
Of my days of starvation, 
I was being fed more than I could handle
Yet I clamored for more
I was addicted to her touch and I found she had me
Craving, 
The elation that our relation was raisin’
I was reachin my peak, coming to an eruption
Of pure adoration.

I use to love her, 

I use to love her and I still do, 
Married for life she is my wife, 
Union of yin and yang
We continue to do our thing, 
She is my muse, the fuse that empowers
My craft, I call her “ a force of creativity” 
The epitome of a unity of two forces
Unrestricted and in motion 
Love that continues flowin.

Are Dreams Dramatic?

Yo, 

I know not the traditional way to greet someone, but "yo" for me encapsulates everything a greeting should embody, at least one from me at this point. This blog is a tunnel into my chaotic mind. I hope this train has seat belts and airbags(like really trains should have seat belts and airbags) because its going to be a rough ride at times. 

I am a writer. 

Not I want to be come a writer or some other passive way of stating a goal that I want to achieve, but obviously since I am writing at this very moment I must have some some formal grasp of the written word. Well, I hope that anyone who chooses to illuminate the minds of others at least knows how to express themselves with eloquence, sincerity, and at all times honesty. 

This small corner of the web is where I plan to give to the world my dreams. Maybe not in the literal way, but through my poetry. Yes, I said POETRY. For me poetry is my escape and I would love for you to lose your selves in my mind and I hope you come out better for having done so. So lets both take a deep breath and inhale a poetic aura. 

Are dreams dramatic?

I absolutely hope so! I hope that my dreams a full of fantasy, adventure, and still full of reality. Oxymoron I know right?! I want my dreams full of reality, well thats me. I hope your dreams are dramatic to because if not then what's the point, where's the fun?